Time Flies

I am about to complete my fifth month and unfortunately I don't have much to report. In fact, (now, Mom, don't read too much into this) I am totally bored of being pregnant. I am bored about feeling pregnant and not totally looking pregnant, bored about not being able to do the things I used to love, bored about talking about (or listening to) what I should and shouldn't do, bored because I haven't felt the baby kick yet and just bored about having to think so much about what goes into my body.
From my boredom, I have decided that we should generally accept the following rules as universal norms:

When a Woman Tells You She is Pregnant
YOU SHOULD NOT:

• Tell her she just looks like she got a little fatter OR
• Tell her she should be much bigger than she is
• Exclaim that her thighs do look a little bigger
• Share the fact that you thought she was just getting lazier
• Tell her she needs to sit down (or that she should not sit in the type of chair where she is currently sitting)
• Tell her what she should or should not eat (especially if she is eating something at that exact moment)
• Tell her what you would do (unless you are a mother)
• Rub her belly without permission
• Tell her to relax more

When a Woman Tells You She is Pregnant
YOU SHOULD (in this order):

• Ask her how far along she is
• Ask her how she is feeling
• Tell her she looks great
• Ask her if she would like anything from the store (and then go get it for her)
• Smile and wish her all the best

 I know everyone means the best and has my well wishes in mind. But, since when did I matter so much to everyone. I thought I enjoyed being the center of attention, but this is just too much! However, I have decided to not be upset by comments anymore, but to just help people understand what their comments do to me. For example, when someone comments on my weight (and to be honest, when people tell me that I look like I haven't gained enough it is worse!) I just tell them that I go for an ultrasound monthly and the baby is perfect!  When I have something in my mouth and am criticized, I encourage them to go and buy me an apple or a banana. This really makes their comments stop! When I am told to sit down, I politely say, "No thank you." And, when I receive comments about being bigger I smile and say, "Thank god!"

So, I have taken control of most of my mental dilemmas with outside forces so far. But I just can't shake the fact that I have not felt the baby yet. I am supposed to feel it any day now, and being an extremely impatient person, I am freaking out a bit that there is nothing kicking me yet. I am supposed to feel some "flutters" first. SO WHERE ARE MY FLUTTERS? I talk to Jungle Baby all the time and encourage kicking, full-force kicking (which hopefully I will regret later).

But, there was one cool thing that happened the other afternoon. I was talking to Amanda and suddenly had the urge to hold onto my lower abs. When I put my hand just below my belly button there was a definite "thing" there. It was hard, round and sticking a bit out of one side of my belly. Amanda felt it too and I walked over to my man for him to touch it. I think it was Jungle Baby's hand or foot, but I have no idea, sticking outward. It was so cool!

Come on and kick me Jungle Baby!

We head back for the next ultrasound on August 16th! Keep your fingers crossed that Jungle Baby opens its legs and show us what is going on down there!